If you watched me read this book, you would see mixture of expressions—disbelief at the horror, incredulity at the forgiveness, amazement at the redemption. This section had it all—but with amazing courage thrown in.As we read these pages, we’re introduced to young people who will be confronted with terror, torture and death. We read of their baby steps towards recovery after the killings, and then of the renewed killing that demands courage beyond what I’ve ever had to practice. These kids are heroes! I have so much to learn from them.
After the violence, through God’s call on his life, one of the young men, Phanuel, becomes an ambassador of reconciliation. He often talks to large groups, and young people are his favorite audience. Part of his message to them would be a message fit for anyone who has suffered something that seems unforgiveable. He says, “We must find a way to forgive. I stand before you today as someone who has personally wrestled with this…. The only way that I’ve found, the only way I know to tell you, is through Jesus Christ. Beaten, mocked, despised, tortured, Christ in his final words here on earth called out, pleading for God to forgive the perpetrators. He was pleading for the forgiveness of you, of me, of the people who have hurt our families and our friends…” (Page 223) This powerful passage reminds me that in Christ the unforgiveable sin is forgivable because He already forgave.
I think you will find the reflective passage very helpful. The author shares how “growing empathy, seeing another person in a larger context, rehearsing positive traits, increasing positive interactions and decreasing negative ones, cultivating cultures and characters of forgiveness, and making meaning together to restore relationships can work to maintain the reconciled relationships we have worked so hard to build.” (Page 231) Personally, I find great hope in these well-thought out tools.
As we post this week—and yes, I really want you to post—we need your thoughts, please reflect on your forgiveness journey. Have you ever forgiven an unforgivable? Have you been able to build any kind of relationship with someone who hurt you or those you love? What did that look like? I look forward to reading your posts!
3 comments:
I'm still hoping that you'll find time to post your comments for this week's reading. In the meantime, I thought I would share a very hard memory that still demands forgiveness whenever I'm confronted with it or the consequences. We served as missionaries when our children were little, returning to serve in the home office when they were in high school. During the years I home-schooled them, I also taught other MKs and one of them sexually abused our little girl for 1.5 years when she was 6 & 7. The story is very long and I won't tell it here... only to say we didn't learn what had happened till our daughter was in college. Since this post is about forgiveness, I will just focus on that and say that we all really struggled to forgive and each of us took a different journey to be able to give forgiveness. Fortunately, our God was willing to help me do what I never could have imagined being able to do--and eventually, with lots of blood, sweat and tears, I did forgive. And since then, have had to forgive many times over. I guess this is why this chapter meant so much to me--the reality of others forgiving the impossible and the tools offered are very reassuring to me.
Linda--
I am so sorry to hear your story. I can only imagine the pain this has caused you as a mother. I admire your honesty and can only imagine how difficult the painful road to forgiveness has been for your family. Forgiving someone for wrong done against a child, that seems to me to be the most difficult form of forgiveness. Thank you for sharing this story with us, Linda.
I was amazed at the stories in this recent section. To see kids that have suffered, have lost so much. Kids who lived through an unfathomable nightmare, coming together in courage and unity. Refusing to be labeled, and putting their lives on the line for one another. I would have thought that after seeing such terrible violence, fear would overcome them and they would have quickly divided themselves into Hutu and Tutsi. But they did not. It was really an incredible story.
This book has caused me to examine my own heart in regards to forgiveness. I am still processing and pondering. I have been convicted of a subtle grudge I believe I have been holding against a recent ministry partner. We are now removed from the situation and do not see him anymore, so it is not something that I even think much about. But when it does come up, I still experience anger and hurt. Still thinking, praying... Though this book has been a difficult read, it has been a blessing.
I will be traveling next week, and may not be able to post. If not, I have so much enjoyed another book with you all. Thank you, Linda. I look forward to the next one. See you then!
Thank you, Pam, for your sweet words of comfort and your insights into this section. The stories really are so inspiring--what the human spirit can do with God's help is amazing--if we're willing. We really do have powerful choices.
I'll miss your comments next week, but I hope your travels go well. See you next book!
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